{"product_id":"the-bonewarden-paddle-of-eternal-obedience-💀⚔️","title":"The Bonewarden: Paddle of Eternal Obedience 💀⚔️","description":"\u003cp\u003eRise from the grave of boring household items and embrace\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eThe Bonewarden\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— a 3D printed paddle forged in the darkest depths of your printer's spool. With twin skulls watching your every move (judgmentally, but supportively) and a blade etched with ancient runes that definitely say something important (we didn't check), this is the most metal way to handle your… paddle-related needs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eFeatures:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul role=\"list\" class=\"css-tu0njr\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e💀\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eDouble Skull Technology\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— One skull for the pommel, one skull for moral support\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e⚔️\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eRune-Engraved Blade\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— Looks like it could summon something, but mostly just looks cool\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e🖤\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eShadow-Forged Base\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— Black as your soul after checking your email first thing in the morning\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e👻\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eUndead Aesthetic\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— For people who want their home decor to scream \"I play Dark Souls and I vote\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e🏰\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eWall-Mount Ready\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e— Comes with a built-in hole for hanging, because even undead knights need organization\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003ePerfect for:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul role=\"list\" class=\"css-tu0njr\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003eFantasy nerds who need to assert dominance over household tasks\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003eAnyone who's ever said \"this would be cooler with skulls on it\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003eMaking your wall look like a trophy room from a video game\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003eGoths who also appreciate functional home goods\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eDoes not actually contain undead spirits. Probably. Results may vary based on your belief in the supernatural.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"chakra-text css-0\"\u003eSpecs:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul role=\"list\" class=\"css-tu0njr\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003e3D printed in PLA (Plastic of Legendary Artifacts)\u003cimg\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"css-xs9fqv\"\u003eTwo-tone design: Bone White \u0026amp; Eternal Darkness Black\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Shade Tree Market","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50608149233907,"sku":null,"price":10.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0851\/2494\/0019\/files\/signal-2026-08-02-19-51-05-205_017.jpg?v=1788040933","url":"https:\/\/www.nightshade.market\/products\/the-bonewarden-paddle-of-eternal-obedience-%f0%9f%92%80%e2%9a%94%ef%b8%8f","provider":"Nightshade Collection","version":"1.0","type":"link"}